TOP 10 REASONS WHY WE ARE NOT HAPPY IN OUR RELATIONSHIPS

1. Our fear of the future: 

Because that scared portion of our brain always reminds us of a lonely future, we cling on to a terrible relationship instead of taking a walk! Worrying dont solve tommorrow's problem, but it can ruin today's happiness..don't you get it? not all relationships we are in are destined for marriage? We were in some relationships to prepare us for the right ones.

2. Wrong timing: 

Relationships built at emotional junctures or heroic moments when we are least likely to think are seriously not it!

3. Sex: 

The reason a lot of people are in wrong relationships or unhappy in the right ones they are in is because, sexual desires block our capacity for clear thinking...we lock out friends and family out and also abandon our personal lives just to be with 'em.

4. Obsession: 

Being obsessed with your partner is not a measure of anything but the level of underground anxiety we are carrying around. We can easily confuse intensity with closeness when, in fact, intensity blocks us from taking an objective look at our partner, ourselves, and our so called relationships.

5. Family Background: 

We are who we are and when it comes to a cycle of family history, especially if we don't know what's driving us...it's real!

You might be aware your family have a tradition to marry someone with addiction problems, or who is an injured bird in need of caretaking. Or, you may be drawn to partners who remind you of your distant, unavailable father/mother or your ill-tempered mother/father with the unconscious belief that you can take an old story, and through the power of your love, give it a new, happy ending. Oops! it's daybreak hun, movies are movies, reality is not!

6. Wow! can someone be this intelligent? 

Because (s)he has the right answers to everything doesn't mean they are above us...everyone's important in life. Though a Burgatti costs around $3million USD it can never perform the function of a pen that costs less than a dollar. Perhaps he has a gift we don't possess...discerning his strengths and weaknesses is part of knowing him better, but an idealized view leads us to undervalue our own gifts and ignore his shortcomings We may continue the relationship in a trance, blind to signs that something isn't right.

7. Priorities: 

Irrespective of what anyone thinks, you are the 1st Most important person in the relationship...how can you claim to love someone when you do not love yourself? But Most of us are looking for someone to fill up your empty bucket, give us some kind of direction, or give our lives a meaning. We make the wrong choices when we're not working at having our own life plan and figuring out how to live our own life, but someone else's!

8. Self-love? 

This sounds like number 7? c'mon wait till you read this. it's "the truth" low self esteem comes from our inability to love our own selves but claiming to want to love others...this indirectly breeds self esteem which tends to make us vulnerable! And our choices when we have this kind of mindseet? a disaster!!! Yeah, yeah, i just did what i promised not to, repeat noumber 7...i did this because self love is so important that i have to repeat this step!

9. Rebelling against family patterns: 

If your dad was a tyrant, you may be drawn to someone who is so passive and voiceless that the same qualities that attracted you will later drive you crazy. When we need to push the differences with family members -- or with an ex-spouse, for that matter -- we land in trouble.

10. Desperation: 

This is more of a female part of the top10...remember how women go, "my two best friends just got married, you're about to turn how old? and someone reminds you that your biological clock is ticking. As the "tick tock" gets louder, you compromise on something that really matters, or you ignore the big red flags waving in your face. half a loaf is better than none is the most stupid phrase ever created - we were not created to opt for half values...we were created for the best!


Now, feel free to shoot me!